Posts Tagged ‘grandmothers’

My cousin’s wife lost her grandmother the other day. She was, as they say, a good age. Ninety four.

But still. When I read it my eyes filled up.

With all the nastiness in the world that I could cry about this is the thing that finally gets me. Although I only teared up. No fits or anything. I’m just saying.

Grandmothers are special.

My paternal grandparents lived in Ireland (and I did not) so I never really knew them. There wasn’t the money to go back and forth. My maternal grandparents were also from Ireland but lived in the U.S. so I knew them very well.

I was close to my grandmother. I am her namesake.

minnie.jpg

She was a gorgeous woman. With auburn hair and green eyes. And a lovely peaches and cream complexion as a young woman according to her cousin Tom Creaney.

I’ve been thinking about her a lot lately. Not exactly sure why she keeps creeping into my thoughts. But I have some clues.

We bought that new house in Rhode Island during the winter so I still really have no idea what the landscaping will look like in the spring. But I did ask the previous owner if they planted lilacs. She said that there were some bushes in the backyard.

Yay! I love purple lilacs. We had them when I was growing up. So it’s a part of the grand scheme.

It made me remember my Nana. She was allergic to them. And there was a bush right outside her kitchen window. Where she sat a good portion of the day. Doing her puzzles, scanning the newspaper, reading letters, cutting out photos with “The Fonz” or “Donny Osmond” for me and eating her meals.

She did not own the house so she suffered instead of requesting the bush be removed.

Wish I could sit and commiserate with her until the allergy season passed.

I now walk every day in Delhi parks. I goof around on the gym equipment that the Lion’s Club has generously provided.

One day, I see a lady who looks like an expat. Maybe I will strike up a conversation. See what we have in common.

Ummm. She’s got banana curls. I cannot remember the last time I saw anyone with banana curls.

My first thought? Friendship might be a tad difficult if she is on the high maintenance side. That’s totally not my thing. I’m thinking banana curls take a bit o’ time.

I envision, “Hey, want to grab a coffee or a drink?”

Response, “Sure! In four to six hours. Gotta curl my hair!”

Okay, totally being unfair to this woman. Plus I am sure they’ve perfected that banana curl look with a simple tool.

Nancy, my Canadian friend said, “You never know!”

But it made me think of my grandmother once again.

I, too, had banana curls. My mom has the photos to prove it. Pictures documenting the before, during and after. I’d share but they are at Mom’s house. In a different country. Plus I was probably in second grade so a bit toothless. Not a good look. Makes me seem a bit off in the photos.

In the “during” photos I am seated at my grandmother’s knees. She is setting/weaving my hair with rags. Once a cotton pillow case but torn into strips that wrapped up my hair.

Wish I could sit at her knee now.

My husband and I would always invite her to join us. Even for a drive. She would say, “No thanks, you kids go on.”

I think the last time she said “Yes” was a trip to La Salette Shrine during the Christmas season. A place where there are tons of Christmas lights. That was many years ago.

Wish I could take her for a drive.

My brothers and I were reminiscing recently and talking about her. My little brother got in trouble with my Dad one day. After Nana had been babysitting us. Nothing to do with Nana. LOL. She just came up in the memory hashing.

Wish she was here to validate the childhood memories.

Anyway, she’s obviously been on my mind.

A grandmother is truly a special gift. If you still have one give her a call. Take her out. Cherish her.

You will never regret the time spent and I can pretty much guarantee that you will always miss her once she is gone.

 

 

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Today is my little brother’s 50th birthday. I sure wish I could be there to celebrate this momentous occasion. To give him a huge hug.

Last week my cousin Rosemary and her lovely family from Ireland were visiting New York. I wished that I could have been there for that fun family gathering.

But neither was a possibility.

I live so far from home and I also have a child in high school.

The following is written by my brother’s wife, Patty. It was sent to her email subscribers and associates. It’s about choice and destiny.

I already know the story because it’s a part of my family history. The priest at their wedding even mentioned the story of the two families being joined by marriage. But I loved reading it. It somehow made me feel happy and connected. Even though I am miles away.

It really is about choice and destiny.

My husband and I made a choice to move to Malaysia for a job opportunity. Knowing we would be far away from our loved ones. Would miss out on family gatherings and events.

And yet destiny allowed us to experience and meet so many wonderful people who we will never forget. People meant to be in our paths so that we could grow, flourish and see the world through different eyes.

From Patty:

This past weekend my children met their cousins from Ireland for the first time.   It was a pretty wild experience for me personally because seeing all their little faces side by side reminded me that part of our life is shaped by choice and part by destiny.

Let me explain.

These cousins are on my husband’s side of the family but I grew up believing they were my family.  

My husband’s grandmother and my grandmother were close friends in Ireland.   My grandmother came to the States, my husband’s grandmother stayed in Ireland.

My husband’s father and aunt later came to the States and remained good friends with my father so I grew up viewing them as family.  

I grew up knowing and loving many people in my husband’s family (but I didn’t meet my husband until I was much older.)

At least four times in the ten years prior to meeting my husband, different family members had talked about setting my husband and me up.  It never happened.   

Each time his cousin or mother would suggest we meet, I declined.  It felt weird to be set up.  I made a CHOICE not to pursue him, yet DESTINY intervened.

16 years ago this week we sat next to each other at a wedding and we’ve been together ever since.

My husband and I both pinpoint the moment we fell in love – it was about 4 hours after we met.  I know our grandmothers in heaven had something to do with it.  

And as they watch their great grandchildren sitting on this couch I wonder what they must be thinking.  They both grew up in a very small town in Northern Ireland.   And now their families, joined by blood and love, are connecting in Brooklyn, NY 100+ years later.

I truly believe that most of our life is shaped by CHOICE.  And certainly the WAY we experience life is shaped exclusively by the thoughts we choose.  But there are pieces of the puzzle that are shaped by DESTINY.  There are forces that guide us to key people we are meant to meet and experiences we contracted to have in this lifetime.

This knowledge gives me a deep sense of peace because it shows me that you and I can’t screw this lifetime up.  The stuff that really needs to happen, will happen no matter what.  And everything that happens in between is up to us to choose based on what we want to experience.

Doesn’t that make you feel better?!!!

In this week’s featured article I talk about taking small steps to make what you CHOOSE to happen come true.   Read below to make sure you are doing everything in your power to create what you choose!

In love and light,

Patty

Patty is a crowdfunding expert, business coach, author and speaker. If you want to learn more about her then please check out http://www.pattylennon.com

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I had a recent conversation with my husband. About bikes that we owned when we were first married. Nearly thirty years ago.

We discussed the make and where we bought them.

I then asked, “Sure, but did we use them?” LOL

He said, “Yes, we did!!!! We even rode them down the boulevard to your Nana’s house. You don’t remember???”

I said, “No, I don’t remember.” And I didn’t.

He replied, “Really? She was soooo happy to see us.”

I was thrilled that he had that memory. But it really bothers me that I don’t. It was my grandmother! I know it happened. My Nana was always on our radar. But I just don’t remember this occasion.

It saddens me.

But I guess it’s really good to have a partner. In time.

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