Posts Tagged ‘burned’

Hope you all are doing your best to enjoy the new year. Wait, what? February almost a thing?

Hello, summer!

Speaking of sunny climes, my older brother is in Florida for a bit and loving it.

When I visited last March he showed me small holes in the lawn left by some varmint. There were no sightings of the animal. Just the piles of dirt each day.

He started off the new year buying a brandy new cage. I guess enough was enough.

On January 30th, he sends me (and my other brother) an email with the caption, “Finally caught him!”

This is the critter.

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It’s an armadillo for those of you not familiar with the animal. I lived in Texas for a dozen years so had my fair share of them poking in my gardens.

Anyway, I was glad that all of my brother’s hard work paid off in the end. I know the battles that can be waged. Humans vs. nature.

My dad was forever on the losing end with the skunks and squirrels. He’d trap and release them at the nearby golf course. I felt like they played a quick round on the links and hightailed it right back home. He never made a dent in his backyard squirrel population.

I have also kept myself up, many a night, plotting revenge and planning strategic moves to stop squirrels from eating every single bit of the backyard bird food. My mind is like a game of freaking Stratego. Serious stuff.

Yes, I am not ashamed to admit that I have greased the pole (that holds the bird feeder) with oil so the squirrels couldn’t climb up it. They did anyway. Sure, they looked like little strippers in an adult club but they did it.

I sprayed a mixture of cayenne pepper and water on the food-supposedly it doesn’t bother birds but squirrels don’t like it. Didn’t work.

Bought special bird feed that was already treated with “hot” spices.

Also measured the space where the feeders were positioned-far enough from bushes and branches so they couldn’t catapult themselves. But they still managed to attend the early bird special. Munching away. They’ve chewed on the feeders and broken them.

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I’m not gonna lie. I feel like I’m being mocked.

So I can appreciate the glee that comes with winning. I can’t wait for all of the juicy details. Tell me, brother, every step of the hunt.

After my initial “Wow!” I send another email.

Gonna lob an easy one at him-for starters.

“What did you use as bait?”

Eagerly anticipating the blow by blow. The hunter and its prey story.

I’m thinking maybe he put a slab of meat or peanut butter in the cage.

He sends me a response,”Didn’t even bait it. Took three weeks till he finally wandered in. Lol”

What???

I immediately text back, “I do not think THAT constitutes a “Finally caught him!” header on an email. While you’re floating around the pool in your lanai slurping on a Bud Lite doing absolutely nothing!” For three weeks. And then Dopey wanders into the cage.

Update: Today he sends me an email. “Caught another one. Could be the same one. LOL.”

Mocked and burned.

I hope everyone enjoys the rest of the weekend!

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